In the Middle
by Carin Fahr Shulusky
May 3, 2022 Book Blast
Synopsis:
Carrie Young had it all. She was a successful account executive for
a small advertising agency and still managed to be a loving wife and
dutiful mother until her mother fell suddenly ill. As the middle child,
Carrie was never that close to her mother, but now she was needed to
help with the overwhelming task of taking care of her seriously ill
mother. The demands of hospitalization, doctors' appointments and daily
care throw her once prefect life in near chaos. Disagreements with her
siblings, her boss and her mother make her resentful of this new
responsibility. The one bright spot is the chance to know her mother's
stories of the depression and post war struggle as she never had before.
Even as her once perfect life falls apart, she finds a purpose in it
all.
Book Details
Genre: Fictional Memoir Published by: Fossil Creek Press Publication Date: January 18, 2021 Number of Pages: 198 ISBN: '9781736241707 Purchase Your Copy Today: Amazon, Barnes & Noble, GoodreadsRead an excerpt:
By this time, Mom was mobile enough to get to the doctor, or at least so
the insurance company determined. This meant we could no longer get
home visits paid by insurance, so Maria, John, and I had to find a way
to get Mom through the gauntlet of doctors.
Each organ of Mom’s body had its own doctor: cardiologist, neurologist,
urologist, gynecologist, optometrist, dermatologist, podiatrist, and
dentist. Everything was failing and in need of repair. I actually think
we could take Mom to a different doctor every day of the week. As it
was, we managed the most urgent needs and hoped for the best with the
rest. Maria took Mom to the cardiologist, who was managing her
medications and needed to take regular blood levels. I took Mom to the
urologist because she was having urinary tract troubles, possibly caused
by the medications prescribed by the cardiologist. John took Mom to the
physical therapist, who could also no longer make home visits on
insurance. Physical therapy was prescribed by the cardiologist to help
her get more mobile.
Each trip out required us to call her multiple times to remind her of
the appointment, then we had to arrive nearly an hour early because she
would invariably not be ready. Getting Mom ready for a doctor visit
required finding clean clothes, inserting hearing aids, and getting her
false teeth in place—and making sure she made a bathroom visit. Before
leaving we would have to locate her insurance card, her checkbook, her
purse, scarf, and coat.
I’d pull my car up to her front porch through the lawn so Mom would have
the least number of steps from house to car. Getting into the car was
difficult to the extreme. Once I had Mom in the car, I’d load her walker
and cane in the trunk.
When we got to the doctor, we would have to reverse the process: get the
walker out of the trunk and Mom in the door and find a place for her to
sit while I parked the car. I’d run back in before Mom decided to try
to find her own way up the elevator to the doctor’s office or some
thoughtful person decided to help and I’d lose her.
I thought it would be easier when we were finally in the doctor’s office
until the nurse said she’d need a urine sample and handed Mom a cup.
The idea of this eighty-two-year-old lady, who could hardly use the
toilet herself and missed it most of the time, managing to actually get
urine in a cup was so ludicrous I just burst out laughing. The nurse was
not amused. She gave me an incriminating look, put the cup back and
held up a “hat” that fit over the whole toilet seat. Still chuckling
despite my best efforts to stop, I shook my head in agreement and lead
Mom to the bathroom. The rest of the visit went fairly normal.
Before I could go in with my mom, the nurse had to ask her if it was
okay that this person—me—could come into the exam room. Mom looked
puzzled. The nurse muttered something about privacy laws and we went in.
No one noticed that I was holding my breath. I was terrified that Mom
would say no.
No one knew what would come out of her mouth next. If I didn’t go in,
the doctor would surely get incorrect information and whatever the
doctor told Mom would be lost. She could hardly remember having a doctor
visit, much less what he said. But I couldn’t argue the point. What was
I supposed to say? Hey guys, she’s half crazy. Why are you asking her?
Not only would that get me nowhere, it would hurt Mom’s feelings.
Whoever proposed the privacy laws surely doesn’t have aging parents.
Fortunately, she said yes, so I could enter.
The doctor discussed why she was having frequent urinary tract
infections, which I’m sure went right over her head. Then he said, “We
should see you back next month.”
I want to shout, No, please no, but I said, “Is it necessary? I have to
take a day off work to get her here,” I pleaded.
Mom caught that too well and said, “I’m sure Maria will be glad to bring
me.”
Now, the thing I was trying so hard to avoid was out. I made a great
effort to hide from Mom my frustration and anxiety over losing a day’s
work. I didn’t want her to think my work was more important than her. I
didn’t want to think that either, but there it was, always under the
surface, in the deep dark places of my ambition.
I had taken a half day off, left at noon, and didn’t plan to return to
work. My boss would never understand this.
Shopping with Mom on the Internet didn’t work out too well. Visualizing
an item in one dimension just wasn’t working for her, so I thought we
would try the old fashion way. I knew Mom wanted to go to Penney’s so I
thought we would start there. I told Mom the mall had wheelchairs we
could borrow, but she was so negative on that idea that I quickly let it
drop. Even with Mom’s handicap parking pass, we couldn’t get close
enough to the store, so I pulled right in front, got the walker from my
trunk, and helped her in the store. It would have worked well if the
store had any place to sit, but there was nothing.
I told Mom to go on in the store and I’d catch up with her. By the time I
had parked and caught up, she had already found two items she wanted:
one for Maria and one for Katie. She next wanted to buy John a pair of
shoes, so I helped her to the shoe department and she quickly found a
pair of work shoes that she wanted. I made sure we had all the receipts
tucked neatly in her purse. She wanted to find a new blouse for
Christmas, so we made our way to an elevator and up to the next floor.
She walked a small way and suddenly stopped.
“I don’t think I can go any further,” Mom said. “I’m just worn out.”
I knew this was a stretch, but I was hopeful. I asked the sales lady if
there were any chairs in the store. To my surprise, she found a folding
chair from the storeroom and brought it out for Mom. While Mom rested
comfortably—more or less—in the chair, I brought her several styles and
colors of shirts. She picked one and I purchased it for her.
“We could go to another store if you would let me get a wheelchair,” I
offered.
“No,” she said firmly. “It’s not time for a wheelchair yet. I’ll get
Maria to take me another day. I think I need to go home.”
On the way home, we passed our favorite soft-serve ice cream store.
“How about an ice cream cone?” I asked.
“That sounds lovely,” Mom said. We could always agree on ice cream. We
had a wonderful time eating our ice cream. I suppose I inherited my
passion for the stuff from Mom. With the happy ice-cream high, we parted
cheerfully. I carried all her purchases to her bedroom as directed and
promised to return to help with Christmas decoration.
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Excerpt from In the Middle by Carin Fahr Shulusky. Copyright 2021 by
Carin Fahr Shulusky. Reproduced with permission from Carin Fahr
Shulusky. All rights reserved.
Author Bio:
Carin Fahr Shulusky was born and raised in west St. Louis County. She
attended the University of Missouri, Columbia, where she received a B.J
(Bachelor of Journalism). After college she worked in advertising for GE
and Monsanto. She was the first professional woman in her division of
each. After 25 years in Marketing, she created her own firm, Marketing
Alliance. She was president of Marketing Alliance, from 2002 – 2014. She
is a past-president of the Business Marketing Association of St. Louis.
Carin Fahr is married to Richard Shulusky. They have two grown children
and one marvelous granddaughter. Grandma Carin has a life long love of
cooking, even writing her own cookbook. In 2014 Carin retired to devote
full time to writing. Her first book, In the Middle was inspired by her
own battle to care for her beloved mother, Dorothy Fahr. Many of the
stories Carrie Young’s mother tells her in In the Middle came from
Carin’s mother. Carin is a lifelong member of, Pathfinder Church in
Ellisville, Missouri, where she volunteers in early childhood.
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